How I Barely Escaped Death (and Vegan Mofo Day 7 & 8)

That title is a lie.I was just hoping more of you would read this.

HA, damn good trickery if I do say so myself! AND IT WORKED!

Ha again!


The other day, I wanted Chinese REAL BAD. For me, Chinese food is eggrolls, General Tso Bean Curd, and LOTS of veggie lo mein. Since I had none of the stuff to make the eggrolls or lo mein, I settled for the bean curd.


Now, I know the General Tso Tofu is the highest rated and viewed recipe on VegWeb, which is what led me to try it. Perhaps I did something wrong. Maybe I used too much of something. Either way, it was horrible. The meal was doomed from the beginning anyway, since I burned the tofu while trying to dry fry AND the rice cooker overcooked my rice. I should have taken that as a sign to stop and run away. But nope,  i kept on keeping on.

And well, I disliked it. Not as sweet as I had hope, lack of color (so what if I expected the neon red color you get in Chinese restaurants! A girl has to have standards!) , and an overall goopy weird texture.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not blaming the recipe creator. I’m sure with all of the rave reviews the recipe has garnered, I’m sure I did something wrong along the way. Either way, it was a giant fail for me.

Another fail.

I somehow got it in my head that I wanted Spaghetti O’s.

Now, I’ve made this recipe before and loved it, so I set out right away preparing the sauce.

As I’m preparing the sauce I realize, yup… pasta. The only thing I had for pasta other then soba noodles was colored rotini. What the heck, I used those.

Next came the meatballs. I simply didn’t want to take the time and prepare those and knew full well I had leftover chikn seitan in the fridge so I chopped that up and threw it in.

Silly Megan.

I forgot the sauce needed to be pureed prior to faux meat adding.

So right there, the meal was jacked. Started adding random things, alot of nooch, and going crazy.

Overall, it ended alright. The fella loves it while I find it EH.

For being a sicky sinusface, I’m managing pretty well when it comes to cooking. I notice that when I’m feeling EH, I tend to have more fuckyuppys in the kitchen. Does anyone else experience that or something similar?


4 thoughts on “How I Barely Escaped Death (and Vegan Mofo Day 7 & 8)

  1. jaime.sp says:

    I haven’t been sick in a long time, but due to my chronic health condition, when I do not feel well I cannot be in the kitchen. Unless I make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the floor (which I have done in a pinch). Thankfully Robert does/can take over, even if that means ordering food. Sorry your meals didn’t work out and that you are ill, but I’m sure both will improve.

  2. morphineisbadforyou says:

    i trusted you! we all trusted you! never in my life have i yelled at a girl like this b4! when my mother yells at me its bc she loves me! anyways i would eat those noodles. they look good from here

  3. Mo says:

    Recipe fails are always a bummer.

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