Review : Tofurkey Pockets

For the love of god, why on earth did Tofurkey believe it was a good idea to create a vegan version of Hot Pockets?!

Yes, it’s a good idea. Yes, they are delicious and everything I remember a Hot Pocket being (other then full of cruelty, grease, and tasty nasty bits). Yes, they will probably make a BUTT LOAD of money from this product alone. Yes, YES!

Behold, my lovelies!

Thankfully, there is nowhere in Syracuse (YET) that carries these. The wonderful folks at Green Star Co-Op in Ithaca has them, and that is a one hour drive. Otherwise, the fella and I would be shoving these in our pieholes on a nightly basis.

Turk’y, Broccoli, and Cheese is pictured above.

 

Above, BBQ Chik’n.

My one and ONLY issue with the BBQ one was the lack of filling. Not enough, I tell you! The crust on these is a little dry (being they are whole wheat, that’s to be expected) which I don’t think they took into consideration when filling these bad boys. The filling that was there, epic.

Overall, I’m thankful these exist.

And thankful I don’t have these within a 20 mile radius.

Mystery Tea and Food Stuff

ISA DOES IT FOOD!

Breaded Tofu with Pesto and Cauliflower.

The tofu was meant to be fried, but I refused and opted for baking.

The pesto, well, it hid the cauliflower well.

Simple and delicious, the tofu is bound to be common place in my house from now on.

The name of this escapes me but I do remember it was meant to resemble Beef-eroni…. but with LENTILS! It was truly a work of art.

Tempeh Orzilla.

It was definitely an odd mix of ingredients. Orzo, tempeh, sun-dried tomatoes, spinach, and nooch. It was one of the first things from this book that was just OKAY.

Gorgeous to look at, the flavors were lacking. It was just bland.

Not everything in the book could possibly be mind blowing, right?

Prior to receiving my camera for Christmas, I made a good deal of other things from this book. Everything escapes my mind right now (I blame the TV blasting The Taste and my urge to punch the “vegetarian” girl in her twat.

On a side note, I have a question to pose you, my lovely readers.

Anyone know what this mystery tea is?

 

I purchased this at Wegman’s in their tea section and I was an idiot and tore the label off. Obviously it’s a green tea. I seem to remember it was extremely expensive when purchased by the pound. Oh, and it tastes of nori, which isn’t all that shocking.

Anyone?

Ithaca Tofu

Besides the world famous Moosewood Restaurant, Ithaca is worth the hour trip for something else.

Ithaca Tofu.

It may not look like much, but I assure you this tofu is a game changer.

It has a slight cheesy flavor and is so dense, when I throw it in my tofu press, less then a tablespoon of water is expelled. Its versatile, capable of holding up on the grill, and has a fantastic mouth feel.

That’s right….I said MOUTH FEEL.

I could sing it’s praises all day, trust me.

 

While writing out this quick post, I tried to find information on the company that produces this. My search turned up nothing, but I can tell you that almost everywhere in Ithaca carries it.

Not that that matters for the lot of you.

Be jealous I have this fabulous soy product at my disposal!

Sleepover?

Yesterday, I did Bosslady a favor and agreed to watch the kids for a few hours.

Well, somehow it turned into Sophia and Megan Girl Day…

which then turned into Megan and Sophia Sleepover Extravaganza.

Singing along to Hairspray, nails, kittie love, pizza, and baking were had, along with many giggles on her part.

She is hilarious and as you can see, she knows it.

Kitty see other kitty in window?! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?

 

Root Beer Float Whoopie Pies made it into the oven and into our faces, so that might be part of why she found herself so funny.

I’ve always been a fan of pumping the kids full of sugar and then sending them home.

 

As you can see, this post had no real point other then to show you pretty pictures of Sophia.

And kitties.

YOU WILL SHUT THE FUCK UP AND ENJOY IT!

Cocoa Intoxication

TOO MUCH COCOA IS POSSIBLE, MY FRIENDS!

I don’t give a shit whatAlisha says. You hear that, Leash?! YOU LIE!

See this bow of brown blob goo? This is Almost Instant Chocolate Pudding from Fran Costigan’s Vegan Chocolate  . People who know me know I would sell my left lung for a damn good pudding, and quite possibly a kidney for some mediocre pudding.

This? This is heaven.

See that? That’s brownies from the same book. Pre-baked…OBVIOUSLY!

Well, this ridiculous imbecile decided it was genius to put the two together!

 

I present to you…. COCOA INTOXICATION!

No, really. I truly believe after ingesting just a few bites of this hell, I was drunk. Drunk and maybe a bit high. Is that even possible?! And no, there are no drugs in the brownies.

After a few bites, I passed it off to the fella and demanded he finish it. In his delirious, sickly state, he did.

Within five minutes of groaning, pushing it away, and swearing off chocolate forever, he was passed out cold.

OUT. FUCKING. COLD.

Yes, my dear readers….. I have discovered the legal limit for cocoa.